Tat-Covered Canseco Can't Beat Bonaduce

Danny Bonaduce made a bunch of MLB players jealous last night. He was legally allowed to hit steroid rat Jose Canseco in the face.

Fans who witnessed the fight (apparently due to a lack of high-speed car chases on TV) were treated to three rounds of punching and grunting, followed by a heart pounding majority decision -- draw.

Bonaduce, standing a foot shorter than Canseco, told The Post Chronicle, "Part of me says there's a decent man right there that didn't want to kill the little guy. I feel weird that we tied."